Odds are, if you’re reading this, you already know a lot of the details that follow. Out of respect for Elias’s journey and story, we will only be sharing this link privately with friends and family.
We adopted our son Elias when he was born in August 2016. After a relatively uneventful first year of life, he started having tantrums, meltdowns, and other challenges that quickly escalated beyond what’s “typical.”
Despite working with multiple therapists, doctors, and endless reading and researching on our own, nothing we’ve tried has shown a significant impact in Elias’s ability to thrive. The meltdowns have gotten worse and worse to the point that Elias is physically violent towards us on a near-daily basis.
We recently went through a full psych evaluation for Elias. While we now have an official “label” to put on these behaviors, that diagnosis is ultimately descriptive of his behaviors rather than explanatory of why they’re happening.
We don’t fully understand why he’s struggling, but it’s our belief that (1) it’s connected to stress and lack of prenatal care in utero and trauma related to the adoption process, and (2) these aren’t willful choices/behaviors on his part–the hand he’s been dealt has resulted in his brain being wired differently. It is absolutely heart-breaking to hear him say things like “what’s wrong with me?” or “why can’t I stop doing these hurts?”
We have been recommended to pursue multiple therapies for Elias, none of which are covered by our current insurance. Our main focus in recent months (and ongoing) is his work with a trauma-focused play therapist.
Christina and I are each seeing a therapist as well. These past 3+ years have been debilitating and traumatizing for us. Our life with Elias is harder than we ever thought was possible…and yet we love him so deeply and know without a doubt that he loves us deeply too. Therapy continues to help us process all of this, as well as work through our own baggage in order to provide as healthy of a home environment as possible for Elias.
Depending on the frequency of these appointments, we’re looking at tens of thousands of dollars out of pocket per year. Lifesong is a great organization that has given us a $3000 grant to help with these counseling/therapy expenses, as well as another $3000 matching grant. So if we’re able to raise $3000, they will match it–giving us a total of $9000 to put towards these costs. Anything raised beyond that goal will also go towards our therapy costs.
I don’t know how we’ve made it through the past few years, but I do know it would have been impossible without the support of a lot of people showing love to our family. Thank you for showing up again and helping this goofy, lego-loving kiddo move towards healing, freedom, and peace.
STRIPE charges an online processing fee (2.2% +.30 USD per transaction). Your donations will be decreased by this amount. You may also send a check payable to “Lifesong for Orphans”. In the memo line please write “Vinson 90269”, to ensure it is credited to our account. Please mail to Lifesong for Orphans, PO Box 9, Gridley, IL 61744.
Lifesong has been blessed with partners who underwrite all U.S. administrative and fundraising costs (TMG Foundation and other partners). That means 100% of your donation will go directly to the adoption.
- In following IRS guidelines, your donation is to Lifesong for Orphans. This organization retains full discretion over its use, but intends to honor the donor’s suggested use.
- Lifesong is a 501(c)3 tax exempt organization. Individual donations of $50 or more and yearly donations totaling $250 or more will receive a tax-deductible receipt. Receipts for donations under $50 will gladly be sent upon request.