Our girl is a survivor. She was abandoned in an orphanage at 3 weeks old, survived the Haiti earthquake and is now struggling through the biggest fight of her life! All the trauma at such a young age has left its mark on her brain in the form of a severe early development PTSD known as Reactive Attachment Disorder (RAD). This can show in many ways, but for our girl it means that something as common as a feeling of loneliness can create a survival response which is often quite violent. In addition, her mind has partially fractured causing her to regress to a much younger mindset.
All the kings horses and all the kings men….
For the last 13 years we have been trying every option that was available to help her: play therapy, DBT, medicines, attachment therapy, horse therapy, hospitalizations… literally more than I can list. However, in 2019 she took a steep turn for the worse and even though we may get a few days of some relative calm on the outside, her pain never ceases on the inside. In December we started to look for residential programs due to a warning from her therapist that she was at a point that she was either headed to residential or juvenile. Every place we applied to declined to accept her for a variety of reasons. Unfortunately, she has become so out of control that she was arrested April 1st for trying to stab a member of the family and attacking another.
Blessings in Disguise
The recent arrest and time in juvenile surprisingly opened some doors that were not open before. First, for the safety of the home and for her health the court is requesting she be placed in a residential facility. Secondly, because of this crisis situation, a residential boardings school program that specializes in adoption, early childhood trauma and RAD, has made an exception to admit her. When we mentioned this to the court the judge was both familiar with and had a positive impression of this specific program.
It is important to know that, outside of a miracle from God, RAD is not curable. The goal of a program like this is to help the child control their reactions and train them to react differently so that they can have a chance to hold a job, live independently, and be safe to be around others. Programs like this are 1 or 2 years minimum and are expensive, though this one is the least expensive one we have found with a solid reputation and results. To walk this path, we are having to come up with between $84,500 and $95,500 depending on how many visits we have to make. As daunting as that is, we have already seen the hand of God in providing. We have pulled all our resources, and been blessed with some very gracious gifts and are asking now for partners in this journey. Those who will pray for her miraculous healing, partners who pray for the healing of our family, and partners that are able to help us raise the funds. Lifesong has been gracious enough to let us use their platform so your financial gift can be tax deductible. They are also raising the bar by giving us a $10,000 matching grant!
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Lifesong has been blessed with partners who underwrite all U.S. administrative and fundraising costs (TMG Foundation and other partners). That means 100% of your donation will go directly to the adoption.
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